Day 2

"It is the absence of crack that makes a crackhead." -Nick Silva

Day 2 is definitely harder than day 1.  I'm wishing maybe I had also bought a pack of the higher dosage of nicotine gum for the tougher cravings.  I actually woke up in the middle of the night tossing and turning and popped a piece in while half asleep. 

My working energy is frenetic.  It feels a little bit like I took a bunch of Adderall and can't sit still, except my mind is more distracted instead of focused.  I also have that feeling like when you've walked through a spider web and you think a spider is on you and you want to shake all your limbs at once.  Imagine a dog after a bath.  I also kind of want to cry.  Nicotine is a drug, folks, and I am a junkie.

As incredibly pathetic as I sound at the moment, I think it's important a) for me to remember how totally miserable and weird I feel right now dealing with the withdrawals, and b) for other people reading this to realize how shitty this will be to go through someday if you are thinking of picking up smoking.  If you're a smoker and are thinking of quitting, don't let this scare you away.  It will suck, but it's important to know what you're getting into so you can be properly prepared.  I also need to remember that any future cigarette smoked will put me right back here.

Now I would like to give a shoutout to all the amazing people who have expressed their support and encouragement to me about quitting.  Y'all rock.  It means a lot to me to know that I have such a solid support system; I'm not feeling too strong myself otherwise.  I even got a "You Got This" playlist from a friend back in Texas chock full of bands from Fun Fun Fun Fest last weekend (thanks, Emily!!)  I had a pretty bad freakout earlier today and listening to Andrew Bird soothed me immensely.  Unsurprisingly, I think music will serve as essential therapy through the process. 

I hope everyone took advantage of their greatest civil liberty today and got out there and voted.  Also, I hope more of you got out there and voted for Obama!  I don't think my nerves could handle a close race tonight.  Yes, totally selfish.  I have countless other reasons why I want Obama to win, but this really isn't that venue.

My fellow crackhead buddy Nick sent me the below photo last week.  He's storing his nicotine gum in a cigarette case with his inspiration photo of his niece above.  Sweet idea, brah.

Nick's inspiration to stay off the wagon.

 Status: Halfway through day 2.  Feeling like a crackhead, but hanging in there.